This story from back in my neck of the woods perhaps explains some things about me. It at least offers a glimpse into rural north Missouri attitudes.

Headline: "Shots Fired During Drunken Brawl"

key paragraph: When officers got there, they found two intoxicated men who had been assaulting each other.

“We weren't sure who assaulted who so we were trying to figure out who was going to be charged with assault. Upon determination that neither person wanted to be victim, they were both released,” said Wayne Winn, Scotland County Sheriff.

I'm homesick.